Screwin' and Killin'

At the gym yesterday, I was treated to a conversation that went something like this.

Man #1: Yeah, I f$%&ed her a couple years ago.

Man#2: Who, Heather?

Man #1: No, Tanya. Before she got fat. That bitch goes 240, 250 pounds now.

Man #2: You f$%&ed Heather?

Man#1: Yeah, till I got tired of her.

(insipient male laughter)

Man#2: Didn't Tyrone used to f$%& Heather? Whatever happened to Tyrone?

Man #1: He's doin' 10 for robbery.

Man#2: Huh. What about that other one, the one called Bone?

Man #1: He wasn't f$%&ing Heather, he was with Michelle.

Man #2: Michelle? I remember her. Wasn't she real light-skinned? Damn, she was fine. What happened to her?

Man #1: Bone killed her, he's doing 25 to life. She's the one they found over on Myrtle Avenue.

And all the while I'm trying not to listen to this, these two are doing crunches and push-ups like they're talking about sports or the weather or what their idiot girlfriends are making for dinner.

I think I'll start wearing headphones while I'm lifting weights, too.