Elephants in the Living Room
Growing up with an alcoholic father who decided to reform during my teenage years -- which also happened to coincide with the advent of Oprah -- all the self-help terminology from back in the day crept into my consciosness whether I wanted it to or not. "Fake it till you make it"; "One day at a time"; "Daily Inventory"; "Dry Drunk"; "Wet Brains"; "Stinking Thinking".
Whatever.
Alcoholics Anonymous (and all its spin-offs) has a whole glossary of euphimistic code phrases designed to make newcomers think they've joined a frigging secret society -- or a cult, maybe. But the crux of the problem remains the same no matter what words you use to try to hide it: alcoholics and addicts have lost control of themselves and need to get their shit together.
We all need help sometimes to pull ourselves together, and I don't begrudge anyone for getting assistance whether it's through counseling or group meetings or supervised care with prescription drugs. But here's my elephant in the living room, the thing that nobody seems to talk about: how did we end up with a society where it seems there are only two choices -- be an enabler or be an addict? When did it become okay to live excessively for your first 20, 30 or 40 years and then it's okay to sober up and expect everyone's support while you're puling and whining about the mess you've made of your life?
From the time I was fifteen I've heard, "It's a disease, it's a disease." Well, for chrissake, there's a cure for this disease: don't take the drink, don't buy the weed/crack/coke/meth/heroin. Yes, I know it's not that easy. But at some point, shouldn't it be a reasonable expectation that people grow up and weigh the consequences of their actions? When the hell did we decide as a culture to not only tolerate but to glamorize self-indulgence? When did we lose our balance?
My name is Bobbi, and I'm NOT a fucking addict.
Christ, I need a drink.
Whatever.
Alcoholics Anonymous (and all its spin-offs) has a whole glossary of euphimistic code phrases designed to make newcomers think they've joined a frigging secret society -- or a cult, maybe. But the crux of the problem remains the same no matter what words you use to try to hide it: alcoholics and addicts have lost control of themselves and need to get their shit together.
We all need help sometimes to pull ourselves together, and I don't begrudge anyone for getting assistance whether it's through counseling or group meetings or supervised care with prescription drugs. But here's my elephant in the living room, the thing that nobody seems to talk about: how did we end up with a society where it seems there are only two choices -- be an enabler or be an addict? When did it become okay to live excessively for your first 20, 30 or 40 years and then it's okay to sober up and expect everyone's support while you're puling and whining about the mess you've made of your life?
From the time I was fifteen I've heard, "It's a disease, it's a disease." Well, for chrissake, there's a cure for this disease: don't take the drink, don't buy the weed/crack/coke/meth/heroin. Yes, I know it's not that easy. But at some point, shouldn't it be a reasonable expectation that people grow up and weigh the consequences of their actions? When the hell did we decide as a culture to not only tolerate but to glamorize self-indulgence? When did we lose our balance?
My name is Bobbi, and I'm NOT a fucking addict.
Christ, I need a drink.
posted by Delhui at 10:21 PM
1 Comments:
Wow. Very powerful message and I hear you! Our culture definitely glamorizes addiction...in hollywood movies, etc. It is hard to understand, but, "..the cure...don't take the drink..." seems like such a simple solution.
But I don't have the disease, so I can't really understand. Right? (at least that is what everyone tells us...)
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